So. What’s Next?
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| Lauras Graduation From Nursing School |
It has been almost a month since we received the sad news,
not a day goes by that we don’t think about it, about her. What did she name
her? What does she look like? Is she healthy? So many questions that at end it
makes no difference, but makes us hurt a whole more inside. It has been very difficult
these past few weeks, given that I took off so that I could be home with her. I
am now home with a whole lot of nothing to do, and without her.
Through it all we continue to have FAITH, and know that even
though it seemed like she was meant to be our daughter, she’s not, and that God
has chosen the perfect child for us. He or she is not here yet but one day
(hopefully soon) we will be head over heels over this little one, and we will
be able to look back with peace and reassurance at this very difficult time of
our life knowing that God knew what He was doing.
SO what do we do now? We GET UP, we brush the dust of our
clothes, and get keep walking, we keep going. I cannot thank those around us enough,
for your cards, your words of love and encouragement, your texts messages, your
calls, your company, your thoughts, prayers, and hugs. They mean so much more
than you could ever imagine. --I was reading a book the other day, and
something the author said was so very truth, when we focus on the bigger
miracles or life, we sometimes forget the whispers of God of encouragement, and
his presence. He may not have sent an angel to knock on our door with a shiny
face to tell us that HE loves us and that everything is going to work our for
His glory (even though I would really like Him to do so). But he sent His
promise through the words of our friends and loved ones, you are the vessels of
His message and Love for us, thank you.
We didn’t only suffered an emotional turmoil, but it also
affected us greatly financially since we paid a very large amount for her
living expenses that we cannot get back, and because of this and everything
else we struggle to forgive her, but want to, and pray that one day we would be
able to.
{Now we do it ALL
OVER AGAIN} and we will not give up on this desire and dream that we have to be
parents.
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I mentioned in a previews post that there is always loss in
adoption, either a birthmother looses her child because of her selfless love,
to give this child opportunities of a home, and future that she could not give
herself. Or a couple, like us, when the birthmother decides to parent, either
way someone always looses. It does not make it easier but when we think of the
hearts of all of those involved, there is so much love in adoption, so much
that I cannot comprehend, only God can, after all he adopted us as his children
knowing our sinful nature.
Someone gave me this crazy idea, “why don’t you just ask
people to repost your blog and adoption Facebook page, or share it, maybe
someone out there may know someone that knows someone that wants to place their
baby for adoption” …. Is it crazy? Maybe..… But after all God truly does work
in VERY mysterious ways, so why not give it a shot. If you feel led to after
reading our blog, share our Facebook page __ The McDowell’s Journey to Adoption,”
or our blog to others on social media. It has work for some, maybe it will for
us, or not… We don’t know, but everything is worth a shot.
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| +1, or 2 |
As for us right now, we started looking at other cases
(birth moms and their scenarios, and the baby’s due date, gender, etc), if we
feel led to after praying we send our profile book (Books we had made a while
back when we started the process where its basically a summary of pictures and
pages of our life), then the birthmom looks at different books and selects a
couple. We have not been selected yet, but remain hopeful yet more cautious
this time around.
I want to encourage you today, in whatever you may be going through, loss, grief, new diagnosis, infertility, discouragement, hardships, etc. Know that Jesus understands you because He has been there, know that He is ALWAYS with you, he is walking along your side, and HE will not leave you, and He will give you strength when you have none left, He will lift you up when you fall, and he will be your friend in your time of need. Like He has been for us.
I want to encourage you today, in whatever you may be going through, loss, grief, new diagnosis, infertility, discouragement, hardships, etc. Know that Jesus understands you because He has been there, know that He is ALWAYS with you, he is walking along your side, and HE will not leave you, and He will give you strength when you have none left, He will lift you up when you fall, and he will be your friend in your time of need. Like He has been for us.
Please continue to pray for us, for protection, for wisdom,
and peace.
We thank you, ALWAYS, for your support and love.
PS: my email address is lauraquintana89@gmail.com
If you read this and know someone that knows someone.
Love,
Laura
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| He's Truly my Rock .. I love you |
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