Sunday, December 7, 2014

Our Last Holidays without a baby? MAYBE?

A LOT has happened since our last post-
Were to even begin? the past few months have been full of emotions, great news, sad news, family time, life group time, and time for just us Jason and I to cherish it. As the days go by more people know about our plans and sometime Jason and I sit and talk and ask each other about peoples reactions when they hear that we are adoption, and we even wonder what do others think? and some people have asked us some similar questions that I am so happy to answer.

questions I get all the time:
-why are you so open with your adoption plans?
DO have questions for us? please comment on this post, We would love to answer them for you.. even if we don't know you!
A lot of people think that adoption should be a private matter because of "what others would think" and honestly we have live the vast majority of our lives concern with that, NOT ANYMORE! we are seeking to please no one but only God. we are seeking no approval, or disapproval. We have come to truly realize who cares for us and our happiness, and who simply should not be a priority in our life.
We are open about our plans and tell others just as if any other couple were pregnant, would you want to tell the whole entire world that you are? SO ARE WE, we're just a different kind of pregnant.. as Ive seen somewhere-- we're "Paper Pregnant" and we are full of joy because of it. 

Another big part of our openness about it is because so many people are struggling with Infertility, and have been for so many years, and they are doing it alone. Infertility is hard, and no one should have to do it in silent or alone. So we tell the world we are infertile, but rejoice that adoption will make us parents sooner than later, we know so because we trust in God's promises. 
 The best part about it is, we have found such great support from family, friends, and complete strangers that never imagined could have before. 


The holidays were full of surprises, family time and laughter. Jasons parents came down and so did my family. I don't think anyone can remotely imagine what holidays are like in our household. My parents speak little to no english and his parents speak no spanish.... just take a second and picture that... playing board games. eating around the same table, saying grace. YES it gets interesting, but we wouldn't trade it for the world.  
if you ever tried to get your turkey tender, try this: bake it upside down, we did so (unintentionally) but it WORKED, best turkey ever!! anyways.. food was great but thinking that this could be our last thanksgiving without a baby made it a meaningful one, and so will be the next holidays to come. our very lasts, before our very "firsts"

our Life Group at OCC
Jason and I host a life group (bible study) in our house on wednesdays and God put some amazing couples in our life that meets with us to study the word and learn about God. Early this week we had the opportunity to serve together, and went to Operation Christmas Child to sort boxes, toys, wrap, etc. We laughed and saw some beautiful moments that made us stop and catch our breath. little kids from parts of the world write letters, and pack boxes that will make their way to needy children on the other side of the world, a box carries more than toys, pencils, books; a box carries hope, meaning, love, and GOD. One little card took our breath away (we had to inspect them in case there was money that needs to go on a different pile but we put them back in the same box) a child painted his little hand and placed it on the card, and said to the child receiving it, when you put your hand on mine I will be praying for you. and i thought If the world could be like this, and have the love of a child, this would be a nicer place to live. 

Thankful for them.. always 

I got to meet with some wonderful ladies today, the same ladies that met in a different life group some years ago when i was brand new in my walk with Christ. This ladies were the first ones to hear about us trying to conceive and nothing, were the first to hear about our infertility diagnosis, and each of us took on different roles, and even formed different groups. I would have never imagined in a thousand years, that I would be: one, hosting a life group in my home with my husband, in the journey of adoption because of Gods calling, had partaken on a mission trip that changed my heart. God works miracles in our lives every day, and He continues to surprise me each and every day. it amazes me to see how perfectly he works things out, how each person that crosses out path has and had a purpose, some for just a season, some for the long ride. But each takes up a place in your life, in your heart that time can't wash away. 

I am so thankful, for the beautiful people that I have had the privilege to know, to learn from, and the ones that I have yet to know, because it is not by coincidence but faith that we cross each others paths. This is why Ive decided to let God be God, not question him, not try to understand Him, to not try to be perfect or control it all, but let HIM do it all. Its the hardest thing one can do, but the most liberating feeling to know that He holds the world in his hands, and that He will work things out on his time, and in His way. learning to trust God is the hardest things us Christians have to do, but yet the one that can free us from our worrisome, anxiety, and most importably our fears. 

So friends, please pray not only for us, but for all of those who are in journey of adoption, for the birth moms who have the hardest decision to make for them and their child ,and for those who are struggling through infertility to know adoption is a beautiful way to grow their family.
Stay tuned for HOPEFULLY extremely exiting news SOON. 

I pray for all of those who read our blog, to find a glimpse of Jesus in us and our life and to know that  in him there is love that you can't find anywhere else. 

Merry merry Christmas from this "paper pregnant couple"


Friday, October 24, 2014

Roller Coaster of Emotions

A roller coaster of emotions

We got on the adoption ride knowing that we will have ups and downs, times where nothing really happens and we are on a flat road, then suddenly comes a hill with a fall right after. As we climb those hills we know that we have to hold tight to God’s word and His promise, and be each other’s fortress.

I recently read a blog about adoption (I like to cry apparently, since I look for readings that have that effect), but in all of the stories across the nation I hear words that give me hope, and advice. When we pray as we go through the adoption ride, I personally struggle with knowing what to really pray for. This has become true especially in the past month that we have received 5 different birth mom profiles; from which we have sent of profile book to two of them and neither one of them chose us. It sounds harsh, but we know a rejection is Gods protection, and even though we KNOW that GOD will give us the baby that is meant to be ours, it is still painful and difficult.  Our weeks sometimes go a little like this: our consultant Teri sends us an email with a birth-mom’s profile in it ( YAY WE GET EXCITED AND SIT ON OUR COUCH TO READ THROUGH  IT TOGETHER) we wage the pros and cons and get our hopes up and envision the rest of our life in 5 minutes, (It’s going to be a girl and because of the race may look like such and such, Jason think he will be a protective dad of his little girl, I imagine myself making her bows and buying her beautiful dresses) then we send our book with our entire heart and hope in it and PRAY that the birth mom will find in our book and in us what she wants for adoptive parents for her child.  Then we wait and wait and wait for her to pick a family, then nothing happens and she changes her mind about adoption (SADNESS). Next week another profile comes via email (YAY AGAIN) this time is a boy due in a certain date that sounds perfect, OMG mommies love their little boy and Jason would have the best time playing sports with him on and on and on we AGAIN envision the rest of our life in a glance. AGAIN we send the book and hope this time she may pick us. Thankfully she decided within a day of looking through potential adoptive parent’s profile books, and it was NOT US AGAIN. (SADNESS).
Three different one came through that we decided not to pursue for multiple reasons, but those two really touched something in our heart we never felt before. And we found ourselves praying for a different thing every day.

So we wonder- what should we even be praying for?

That we would get a new birth-mom profile soon? That wherever she maybe she is taking care of herself and the baby? That she may find an agency that can direct her to us? That the baby is safe in utero and so is the mom? That this may happen soon? That when she sees our profile she may see in us the love, home, future, and family that we can give to this child?

WE JUST DON’T KNOW! So we pray for everything, especially for Gods protection, for His Love to be in the birth moms heart, for Him to give her strength, for Him to comfort us in our waiting, for Him to keep the baby safe at all cost.  Most importantly for HIM to show us who that is, our awaited and prayed for child.   

As we wait we prepare too! The room is picked out, and the closet is getting filled with blankets that my mom is making nonstop (she’s so excited to be a grandmother), we have Jason’s baby stuff in the room hoping to pass them down.  We got a cute bassinette that my mom is making a cover to be soft and cozy for it that will be in the room VERY SOON, so that we may look at it and pray even more for our baby, and envision him/her sleeping peacefully in it as we both watch him/her sleep.

As the days go by God has shown us His provision for our adoption through the faces and gifts of perfect strangers (what better way?)

During our bake sale people came out of know where that we did not know and gave us money just because they wanted to contribute to our adoption fund, GOD IS GREAT! We are so thankful for such acts of kindness of the people that have contributed. From those who did the baking to those who bought the baked goodies, we know Gods hands and work are all over this, and in it we find comfort and peace.  

WE are praying that we may receive one of those very exciting emails soon from our consultant with another birth mom profile and that A MATCH will happen soon!!

Thank you for reading, for caring, and praying!!!

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

In the Search for Baby McDowell: Hello Fall!

In the Search for Baby McDowell: Hello Fall!: Fall is finally here! Our favorite season, the cool crisp air, and warm sunrays, cool mornings and mild afternoons! Fall brings a lot of me...

Hello Fall!

Fall is finally here! Our favorite season, the cool crisp air, and warm sunrays, cool mornings and mild afternoons! Fall brings a lot of memories to us, especially our wedding day! A perfect fall day the happiest day of our life to this day. 
We have no enter the waiting room again, as we wait to be matched with a birth mom! this is very exciting and nerve wracking at the same time. So in the mean time we will pray everyday for our baby!

This time has given us the opportunity to come up with different ideas to help our fundraiser.. 
1. We had friends and family donate "stuff" that they no longer used for a yard sale!! we started out by just thinking a few things here and there, to a complete garage full of "stuff" OUT OF NOWHERE.. We are so thankful with our friends and family for contributing in such way! our garage sale was a hit and were able to raise almost $600 YAY
2. Laura started an easy shop where she's selling charmed bracelets, this will be a slow process but we hope it will be a hit too with Gods help!
the name of the shop is :Glimpse of Hope Bracelets.. go to Etsy and check it out! or simple order one from us directly .. they are personalized .
 WE'RE HAVING A BAKE SALE!!! This Saturday October 12, from 2pm-5pm on our drive way :)  if you want to come send us an email and we'll give you our address! the more the merrier
Some amazing friends have stepped out to donate some sweet treats for the sale. So thankful for them 

We started a new life group that now meets at our house on wednesdays, and with it three new couples that are now part of lives, Forest Hill Church not only has given a stronger faith foundation, but many many people that we now call friends :)
Jason just had a birthday and we went to see his parents in WV and celebrated with them
Our good friends and neighbors got married!! more celebrations this month 
and our soon 3rd Anniversary is just around the corner * days and counting :) God likes to surprise us some how during this time of our life.. lets see what surprise He has for us this time!

Adoption is so different than we envisioned it, but we are so glad to be in this journey together! We both have hopeful hearts that we will look back at
this time and it would all seem so worth it.

I stumble across this picture. It sums up what an adoption is! 
it reads: "In adoption a child is not GIVEN UP,.
A birth mom GIVES life, a child a family, unconditional love. 
she GIVES a part of her heart that will never feel whole. 
she GIVES another mother a part of her heart that was always missing
An adoptive mother GIVES a life and family to this child and 
she GIVES unconditional love
she GIVES a part of her heart to another mother

"For He chose us in Him, before the foundation of the world, to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted through Jesus Christ for Himself, according to His favor and will"- Ephesians 1:4-5

This verse speaks to us so much, it tells us how adopted us through Jesus, how He chose us!! Just like that we also want to chose and adopt a little human into our life, to love as our own! How Blessed we are for been able to do so

Wednesday, September 17, 2014


Approval paragraph :) 
A lot has been going on the past few weeks since our last post. For those who don't understand adoption lingo that much this is why this week has been so important for the two of us. Any couple or anybody considering adoption has to complete a Home Study where a Social Worker meets with both adoptive parents separately to interview them, interviews them together, and lastly does a home visit, (not mentioning the countless amount of legal documents, background checks, FBI checks,etc) and this can be a very lengthy process it takes up to 11 weeks at times. But God is truly doing some work with our process because our home visit was done less then two weeks ago and yesterday as we were heading to a LifeGroup Connect to our Church we checked the mail, and there it was YAY GOD! our approved Home assessment, that states that Jason and Laura are approved by the law to become adoptive parents of one or two children fem ages newborn to 6 months. This is SO BIG I can't put in words, we are so grateful that it went by so quickly and smoothly, the answer to how this h
appened so quickly is very simple, GOD! We sometimes forget how powerful and amazing He is, He is constantly reminding me to Trust in Him in everything with all of my heart and all of my mind and to not rely on my own understanding.
THIS MEANS WE CAN START LOOKING AT BIRTH-MOMS and actively start looking for OUR BABY :). this is so surreal.
On the other side of things, we were asked to put together a photo book (the shutterfly type), this book will be our profile book, the one that birth-moms will look at. Well after waiting for weeks for them, they arrived today! Once again, very promptly :).
We are so excited with everything that has happened and even more about our hope, our dream, of our baby. Every day that goes by we feel closer to meeting our angel, we don't know when, how soon, or anything. What we do know is that we are entirely in the will of God, and that He's timing is better than our, and we trust in Him.

Please continue to pray for our adoption, for our baby, and for wisdom to know who to chose when the moment comes down to it. We also want to ask you to continue to pray
for our fundraising that we would find the way to found this dream of ours somehow.
We are so grateful for everyone who has donated so far, and has gotten us to this point in our adoption, to access our fundraising account, copy and paste the link below :) we will be eternally grateful

Thank you for your prayers and support! We truly cannot do this alone
but as of now,
We will continue to trust in the Lord, for He is good, and His love endures forever!!
Jason & Laura

Friday, August 22, 2014


After just a few weeks Jason and I are getting more excited as the weeks go by, we both have days where we get a little discouraged when we see in the news about scamming adoptive parents, or failed adoptions, or the many fears that come with the process. But we trust that we have picked to very known and trusted companies to be our biggest foundation in the process.
1. A Step Ahead Consultant: YAY for them who will be the ones helping put our profile and book (scrapbooking, pictures about us, "my specialty") together, along with finding many cases throughout many agencies in the nation to find our little baby. our amazing consultant's name is Teri and she will be doing a lot of handwork and will make us work jut as hard, there's classes to take (online), page after page to read about adoption, but at the end it will all be worth it.
2. Nathanson HOME Study: we have a social worker now YAY!! (Sarah) , and already have a meeting set up in just a couple of days, 1st- of 3 meetings.
SO FOREVER GRATEFUL WITH OUR CHURCH Forest Hill and our family and friends who have made this big steps possible with your contributions. our amazing Church gave us a grant to get us started.  We don't know where we would be if it wasn't for the Forest Hill Church Family and our family and friends who are supporting us every step of the way.
It has been such an amazing journey so far, everyday that goes by I find and Jason does do a new strength in us that we did not know we had, we meet couples everywhere that are also in the process of growing their family through adoption, HOW AMAZING IS THAT? giving little ones the chance of a loving home that they would not have other wise. God is doing some work around here!

When we get a little discouraged God reminds us that He is in control of it all, after all He created the heavens and the earth in just 6 days, how can we doubt Him with something so little in His grey might and Power?

These two verses gave my heart some ease the past couple of weeks:
" God is my strength and power, and He makes my way perfect" 2 Samuel 22:23
"The Lords is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me" Psalm 28:7a

Please continue to be in prayer for us as we begin to take yet the biggest steps of our journey thus far!

L & J

Tuesday, August 5, 2014

Baby Steps-

Today was a great day!!!!
Jason and I met with one of the pastors from our church, Forest Hill, whom has adopted two children also, and we were given a grant (YAY GOD) and along with some other funding that we have gotten from friends and family we will be able to start the fun part, Home Study, and signing contract with Steps Ahead Adoption Consultants, whom we have heard amazing testimonies on baby placements.
This means we are one step closer to meeting our baby, and this is so overwhelming and exciting that I cannot put it in words. The thought that we may be a family sooner that later fills my heart with so much joy that it may burst.
Today the Lord reminded me not to worry about tomorrow because each day has a worry of its own, I am trying not to worry and not think about the large sum of money that we have to come up with, but I know God will provide a way, he will show Himself to us through others, who ever that may be. lastly pastor Mike reminded us today what a bumpy road this may be but oh how worthy is, when you get to hold your baby in your arms and look at him/her in the eyes and know that God chose that little human being for us, and he left us with this verse that I will carry in my heart:
"God sets the lonely in families"- Psalm 68:6


Saturday, July 19, 2014

Praying for our Little Miracle as we Begin our Journey of Adoption

And the work begins,  the past couple of weeks have been busy work, trying to determine what agency we are going to chose if any, what company to do our home study. But God has found a way to put someone in our path that went through the same, and was able to give me advice in some of the different avenues that we can take that we never thought of. So here's the plan "at least our plan"- Jason and I are choosing a consultant that is able to work with many many genies throughout the nation that will facilitate the placement of a baby sooner, and an separate agency to do our home study, Please pray for us to be making the right decision. 
In other news, we have our FUNDRAISING page up and running as of today, and hope and pray that our family and friends can become part of us becoming parents, and would be willing to help us in any way possible. 
I once heard that god will not put you through something unless He can get you through it, well this is true now more than ever, He surely has His hands all over adoption, and we know and believe that if he made us take this big step, he has paved the way for it and will get us through it. He is our guide, our stronghold, that cannot be shaken, and in Him we trust alone to make something beautiful out of our circumstances.
Below is our fundraising page:

Monday, June 23, 2014


This is by far the most exciting news we have to share!! after some years of infertility we have decided and hope that it is the will of God for us to adopt our “missing piece.” This will be a long journey that awaits ahead of us, but this is the main reason we started this blog to share our every step of the way with friends, family, and anyone out there who is going through something similar. We want to have all of the prayers and support we can get from everyone in our lives, since we know it will be a long difficult bumpy road. 
Never in our life did we imagine taking this step, I never thought I would adopt a baby since I always dreamt of carrying a baby in me, and neither did Jason, but God can surely do it all, including changing both of our hearts in such way that we are so overfilled with Joy with this new season that’s ahead.

The Journey to finding our “missing piece” and making this family of 2, a family of 3 (or more). 
Next step.. finding the agency… and start the fundraising for our family and baby McDowell
In case you did not know or where wondering Adopting is extremely expensive Domestic and international and after many phone calls, emails, and extensive research we found that domestic adoption is the best fit for our marriage, because of our ages and length of marriage. 
We hope we can count on your prayers, and support since without those around us we can’t do it. We are tired of doing it alone, and trust that God will provide a way for that little one to be in our family and arms soon! 


Saturday, June 14, 2014

Laura on A Mission Trip, DR

Fast-forward a year, we are in a new season, still waiting for our miracle. But have decided that we will not stop praying we will just pray a different prayer, that the Lord our God will give a baby even if its not from us, we are letting His grace work in our lives in a different way. We have decided to follow Gods foot steps, and make disciples. 
Laura decides to go on a mission trip to Santo Domingo in the Dominican Republic, and who would of thought as if we could ever doubt his provision, the fundraising for her trip was finalized in less than a month!!! 
June 14 she’s off to the DR> 
June 21 She’s back changed and so is our marriage!

In my heart I knew i would be okay with adopting but never felt strongly about it, until I returned from the DR, and Jason never thought about it only if it was our very last resort. but now!!! More to come!